How to Embrace Grief and Grow

“We need to grieve.”

Most of us think of grieving in relation to the death of a loved one—a process we must go through to “get on with our lives.” However, grieving is a "grace of God for more."

Responding to God's call for more requires leaving something behind: security, long-held beliefs, even people and places we grew to love. It always necessitates a dying to ourselves. This requires grieving.

Grieving is not something we readily embrace, because we associate it with negative events. However, let's begin to see grieving as a grace God has provided for all His children. Knowing our weaknesses, He has given us grief that we might more easily and productively walk through the necessary transformation {2 Corinthians 3:18}.

Consider these benefits of grieving:

1) It prepares us to let go while making the first step possible. Saying goodbye is a liberating and empowering experience. Even when we don’t know what we're leaving, offering up our “whatever” to God releases His grace for the journey.

2) It allows us to keep our face turned in the right direction. God designed us to face toward the direction our feet are taking us; so that we avoid tripping over obstacles and running into others. Those who keep looking back have a tough time finding God’s path.

3) It makes future grieving easier, as God calls us to let go of more. Transformation is a process. Dying to ourselves, that God might be our all-in-all, is not a one-time event (and this is God's mercy). As God proves Himself faithful as we let go, we then grow to trust Him for more. In other words, our faith grows as we transform.

Grieving is a relational activity. God uses it to build our relationship with Him, and each other. The beginning point for grieving should always be prayer, and that in a community. When we're ready to take the first step in our adventure toward more, let's ask God to reveal something that we need to leave behind. This will allow us to practice the grieving process, and He will meet us there.